October 2008

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alex's life book

  • In early 2006, I began creating a life book for my daughter, Alex. Click here for links to articles describing my experience.
  • And for those of you who are more digitally inclined, in late 2006, I recreated key pages of Alex's lifebook for an article I wrote for AlphaMom, using Scrapblog.

    You can see the final digital result (and leave comments, if you'd like!) here.

what's been on my nikon lately

  • And you can view my favourites here.

if i'm not here, i'm here

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You and me, baby...we were born days apart-- 1967, the summer of LOVE. Anyway, I've been thinking about this too.

#1 is to get a book proposal pulled together. (Oh, my, it feels so pretentious to write this that I am now fighting the urge to backspace it into oblivion.)
#2 - lose 10 lb
#3- I'd love to go on a trip just with my hubby...

Mary, mom to many


It is not what I want to do before I turn 40 that I want to share; it's what I did AFTER I turned 40. (I'm 45 now.) After resigning myself to being single and childless at 39, I then met a wonderful man and married when I was 40. The next year I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. So, the moral of my story is... 40 is an artificial demarcation. Never stop hoping, never stop trying, never stop dreaming -- just about anything is possible at any age.

Goals for my next birthday? Get through all the birthdays and holidays in the next two months!! And, finish the journal I'm writing for my daughter. It is for her to read as an adult to give her another perspective on her childhood.


I turn 40 this December and have similar thoughts. I look forward to reading some of the comments to get ideas for my 40th year too.

If I could travel, Sydney is ontop of my list with China a close second.


thank you for the post. I just wrote an e-mail to a friend I haven't been in touch with for awhile.


Karen, I have a list of 40 things I want to do before I turn 40 on the sidebar, which is now 2 years away. I'm not sure how many I even want to do any more, or how many just won't happen because of other constraints, but it was nice to pull it together and go back and look at it periodically. I might have to revise it to 40 things to do before 50 ;-)


That's a good question! I'll be 35 in one year and a few weeks, and I often think of it (whereas I think 34 will pass by relatively unnoticed.) I'm happy in my life, so that makes it harder for me to think of what else I want to accomplish in the next year (or 3). But now that you ask, here are some short-term goals...
1. Visit most of the special places I've bookmarked in the Mexico guide books while we live here for the next 3 years
2. Pay off my student loans
3. Keep up my working out so that I can do 20 push-ups in a row


A friend of mine turns 40 in December. She and her friend are going to Nicaragua to build homes for families displaced by poverty. This was her 'dream' birthday present -- giving to others. I know you said travel was out, but...in the name of charity?

The Wooden Porch

You could learn how to quill. It's a fun hobby and so beautiful!


You say you find it a bit sad that you haven't got a pre-40 goal in mind... well, that's one way to look at it, but kinda linear. This might be the year you sit on your front porch, (metaphorically speaking), watch the parade, re-group and reconnoitre. (and chase after the kidlet)


I never thought about trying to accomplish something before 40. Hmmm. That's an idea. Too bad I'm 41. :-)

Post 40, in unguarded moments, I worry that my ship has sailed but then I remember that it is just a number, one that indicates nothing about my potential or the perfect steps God has ordered for my life, if I seek with my heart and walk them.

But back when I was 35 and childless, a woman I'd just met was chatting with me about my goals for the future. She decided to put her hand on my arm, look into the sky, and tell me to accomplish them "before the children come." Slightly hopeless due to my infertility, I was a little freaked. About a week later, I called a seminary where I'd considered pursuing a degree. But it went no further.

That's what I worry about, in more unguarded moments, that I didn't accomplish those goals and will never have that kind of time again. Because the child(ren) did come. Life with our daughter is blissful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. And come to think of it, maybe, instead of worrying about what I didn't do, my goal should be to think of the things I want to accomplish once she enters kindergarten and put the mechanisms in place to get them done.

On another note....

You are a fiercely independent sort, so perhaps this won't be as significant to you, but one thing I noticed after 40 was that I rarely care what anyone else thinks about my choices anymore. I'm comfortable with my looks, and more risky with my attire--but not in a what-is-she-doing-in-a-miniskirt-after-40 way. But in a strapless evening dress sort of way. And I haven't decided whether it's because they know I'm past 40, or whether I've actually become more wise, but people seem to respect what I have to say a bit more. And then there's the whole self-awareness replacing self-consciousness thing. I know part of it has to be my daughter, but really, truly, I'm much happier now than I was in my 20s and 30s, in the days long before I started mourning the empty extra room.

It's a good ride, so no worries, mate.


I turn 30 next year so can I make it my when I turn 30 list? It's not so long, but I want to have started a family, and I want to be published. By 40 I want to be a successful author and have a big ol' family. Around 45 my husband and I want to take a bike trip across the UK with our children. That motivates me to stay healthy.


Ah, I have to add to the "I want to write a book" pile. Sigh. So unoriginal. Yet so DESIRABLE.

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