bits and pieces

This weekend, Marcus' friend Nathan, from Oregon, came to visit. The above images are from his first visit to Maracas beach this past Sunday morning.

This morning, as I turned on my computer to get my day started, I found I'd received an e-mail from someone I actually don't know very well, but who I like immensely. She shared with me a blessing she wrote for herself yesterday, and said she thought of me as she wrote it. It's the nicest thing anyone has done for me all week, and I was so moved by the gesture.

Because of her kindness, I felt like I had an obligation to pass it on -- so I just dropped an e-mail to a friend who I haven't spoken with in a while, telling her I was thinking of her. And since all of you are currently sitting at your computers as you read this, consider dropping an e-line to a friend you haven't heard from in a while. Trust me: you'll make his/her day, and it will mean more to them than you know.

* * * * * * *

Lately I've been thinking about the fact that I'll be 40 next year -- not with any sort of sadness, but more with a sense of wonder and awe. I mean, how is that possible? Besides, it seems like such a milestone, you know? Forty years old: it's like I'll officially be grown up.

I've been trying to come up with things I need to accomplish before I turn 40 next July -- and honestly, I'm not coming up with a lot. I find that a bit sad, actually. I hope that I always have something that I want to accomplish before my next birthday - isn't that how we grow?

So, my little kumquats, I'm turning to you again for inspiration: what do you hope to accomplish before you're 40? And if you're already 40, what are you most proud of accomplishing? And what do you still want to accomplish before your next birthday?

For me, I know that my things-to-do-before-40 won't include any travel -- partly because our opportunity to travel over the next year is pretty limited, but also because I've traveled a lot already, and except for 1 or 2 places (Sydney and Tokyo coming immediately to mind), I can't think of anywhere that I want to go that I haven't already been. I think I'd like to learn something new ... I just don't know what.

So share your thoughts -- I can't wait to read what you share.

(P.S. Happy Eid!)

__________

Comments

[owlhaven]

You and me, baby...we were born days apart-- 1967, the summer of LOVE. Anyway, I've been thinking about this too.

#1 is to get a book proposal pulled together. (Oh, my, it feels so pretentious to write this that I am now fighting the urge to backspace it into oblivion.)
#2 - lose 10 lb
#3- I'd love to go on a trip just with my hubby...

Mary, mom to many

[Sophie]

It is not what I want to do before I turn 40 that I want to share; it's what I did AFTER I turned 40. (I'm 45 now.) After resigning myself to being single and childless at 39, I then met a wonderful man and married when I was 40. The next year I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. So, the moral of my story is... 40 is an artificial demarcation. Never stop hoping, never stop trying, never stop dreaming -- just about anything is possible at any age.

Goals for my next birthday? Get through all the birthdays and holidays in the next two months!! And, finish the journal I'm writing for my daughter. It is for her to read as an adult to give her another perspective on her childhood.

[Christine]

I turn 40 this December and have similar thoughts. I look forward to reading some of the comments to get ideas for my 40th year too.

If I could travel, Sydney is ontop of my list with China a close second.

[Wetnoses]

thank you for the post. I just wrote an e-mail to a friend I haven't been in touch with for awhile.

[chris]

Karen, I have a list of 40 things I want to do before I turn 40 on the sidebar, which is now 2 years away. I'm not sure how many I even want to do any more, or how many just won't happen because of other constraints, but it was nice to pull it together and go back and look at it periodically. I might have to revise it to 40 things to do before 50 ;-)

[Sylvie]

That's a good question! I'll be 35 in one year and a few weeks, and I often think of it (whereas I think 34 will pass by relatively unnoticed.) I'm happy in my life, so that makes it harder for me to think of what else I want to accomplish in the next year (or 3). But now that you ask, here are some short-term goals...
1. Visit most of the special places I've bookmarked in the Mexico guide books while we live here for the next 3 years
2. Pay off my student loans
3. Keep up my working out so that I can do 20 push-ups in a row

[Nicole]

Karen,
A friend of mine turns 40 in December. She and her friend are going to Nicaragua to build homes for families displaced by poverty. This was her 'dream' birthday present -- giving to others. I know you said travel was out, but...in the name of charity?

[The Wooden Porch]

You could learn how to quill. It's a fun hobby and so beautiful!

[Redhead]

You say you find it a bit sad that you haven't got a pre-40 goal in mind... well, that's one way to look at it, but kinda linear. This might be the year you sit on your front porch, (metaphorically speaking), watch the parade, re-group and reconnoitre. (and chase after the kidlet)

[brat]

I never thought about trying to accomplish something before 40. Hmmm. That's an idea. Too bad I'm 41. :-)

Post 40, in unguarded moments, I worry that my ship has sailed but then I remember that it is just a number, one that indicates nothing about my potential or the perfect steps God has ordered for my life, if I seek with my heart and walk them.

But back when I was 35 and childless, a woman I'd just met was chatting with me about my goals for the future. She decided to put her hand on my arm, look into the sky, and tell me to accomplish them "before the children come." Slightly hopeless due to my infertility, I was a little freaked. About a week later, I called a seminary where I'd considered pursuing a degree. But it went no further.

That's what I worry about, in more unguarded moments, that I didn't accomplish those goals and will never have that kind of time again. Because the child(ren) did come. Life with our daughter is blissful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. And come to think of it, maybe, instead of worrying about what I didn't do, my goal should be to think of the things I want to accomplish once she enters kindergarten and put the mechanisms in place to get them done.

On another note....

You are a fiercely independent sort, so perhaps this won't be as significant to you, but one thing I noticed after 40 was that I rarely care what anyone else thinks about my choices anymore. I'm comfortable with my looks, and more risky with my attire--but not in a what-is-she-doing-in-a-miniskirt-after-40 way. But in a strapless evening dress sort of way. And I haven't decided whether it's because they know I'm past 40, or whether I've actually become more wise, but people seem to respect what I have to say a bit more. And then there's the whole self-awareness replacing self-consciousness thing. I know part of it has to be my daughter, but really, truly, I'm much happier now than I was in my 20s and 30s, in the days long before I started mourning the empty extra room.

It's a good ride, so no worries, mate.

[Dea]

I turn 30 next year so can I make it my when I turn 30 list? It's not so long, but I want to have started a family, and I want to be published. By 40 I want to be a successful author and have a big ol' family. Around 45 my husband and I want to take a bike trip across the UK with our children. That motivates me to stay healthy.

[Schnozz]

Ah, I have to add to the "I want to write a book" pile. Sigh. So unoriginal. Yet so DESIRABLE.